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Their Stories
In the context of precarity and coloniality, photovoice becomes a tool of resistance—challenging dominant representations while creating safer ways to share sensitive stories. By later weaving these accounts into composite narratives, the project preserves anonymity while still amplifying collective truths.
Between What Was and What Still Is
We worked at that pondok, rain or shine, and it was really tough. That’s where I started my life—where I raised my child. Whenever we went somewhere, we faced hardships; I even fell ill from working in the hot sun.
Because it’s my house. Everything, good and bad, happens within this home. The hardships I go through there shouldn’t be known to anyone. I’ll walk straight, then stumble and fall. I’ll get up again and walk, but I’ll stumble and fall once more. No matter how many times I get hurt or fall, I’ll keep on trying again until I get what I want.
I once asked my mother, “Why don’t I have any grandparents?” She told me, “They were unwell… and they passed away.” But I never received the love or attention of grandparents.
My father’s side of the family completely ignored us. So, there was no relationship at all between us and them.
Grandfather, what you must have thought, what our ancestors must have thought, “My grandchildren will be well someday, my children will be well someday. They’ll be well in the future. But now nothing has changed. It’s still the same way. We’re struggling now, and we’re thinking the same thing.
I didn’t receive any love, Appa… I can’t trust men… it hurts so much, it’s so difficult.
Why didn’t you take me with you too, Appa? If you had lived happily with Mom that day, my life would have been good today, Appa.
But I am angry with you for one thing: you didn’t leave anything for Amma. You just left her like that. Now, in her old age, she’s suffering so much. That’s why I’m angry with you. You should’ve saved something for Amma.
Maybe if my father had been around… I would have studied better. I would have gone to college. I always had the desire to study in college. But because of my situation, I dropped out in Standard 6. If he had been alive, I would’ve pursued my dreams, gone to college.
But I lived the life my mother never could. At my mother’s home, we struggled for even a single meal. But today, I eat well and live well. That’s only because of the encouragement my mother gave me.
The lesson I learned from the past, from my mother, is the value of charity. Even when she didn’t have enough for herself, if someone came to the doorstep and asked for help, she would teach us that we must give. That’s what she taught us, and I still follow that.
Now, I’m making sure my children continue their education. They are all studying really well, better than I did. You once said you wanted us to speak in English, work in English-speaking environments, and get good jobs. Now, my children are fulfilling those dreams for you.
What We Carry Forward
In the situation I was in, I got married. My mother told me, “No matter how much you are beaten or loved, you have to live with him, as you are married to him.” But I told her, “Earlier, he used to hit me. But now, I won’t let him hit me. If he hits me, I’ll do whatever I have to do.”
Now, I know everything. I know how to be. I won’t be submissive to you. I won’t come to you just to be a servant. I’ll live my life, and I’ll go on my way. But I will stay. I won’t let anyone disrespect me. I cannot be demotivated. Just like how I am keeping the plants fresh, I need to make sure that I succeed in my life. The plant reminds me to improve my life.
Back then, I wouldn’t even go outside. I never went anywhere. But today, with my own money, I’ve traveled to different places. See how far I’ve come! In those days, we couldn’t do anything. But now, I can do everything.
I traveled to my hometown for 12 days. In the past, I wouldn’t even step out. I was scared. But now, I’m not afraid. If we live in fear, people will do anything to us.
Now, I walk with confidence. I travel wherever I want. All this strength came from my mother. She showed me the way. And I continue to walk that path.
Grandma had a big dream to drive a motorbike and get a license. She wanted to travel the world. But she couldn’t do any of that. Because your great-grandfather and great-grandmother were very strict. They would say things like, “You’ll faint and fall if you drive,” and wouldn’t let me get a license.
They wouldn’t even let me go out on my own. I was always under supervision. The same thing happened with your grandfather too. But you, don’t be like me. Be brave.
If you ever want to travel to another country, just go. Don’t think about your age. If you have the money, just go, experience it, enjoy it. We never know if we’ll be here tomorrow. Life is short. Even if it’s something small, enjoy it while you can.
No matter what difficulties you face, never abandon your mother. Keep her happy. I’m a single mother. My son understood my circumstances and, even without a father, didn’t go astray. He stayed on the right path and became a good child.
And I want to continue evolving to change and live differently, to grow. I also want to pass these values on to my children. I’ve already told them, and I’ll continue telling them:
“Just like your grandmother and like me, you should work hard, stay clean, pray sincerely, and respect your elders.”
Our Elders Live On In Us
Scared… yes, scared. What am I scared of? Our people have become very diminished. Back then our people were united. Now everyone is separated, religious problems, work issues, everywhere, all of that is very difficult.
Nowadays, everything costs money. No matter where we go, it’s money. But back then, we managed. The estate life was a truly happy life.
Nowadays, because of office hours and work schedules, everyone leaves for work. Instead of gathering and decorating the place with sugarcane and making Pongal together, people just quickly cook Pongal on the stove in five minutes and leave.
Now people are struggling with just two kids. I feel we should live more courageously like they did in the past—without giving in to depression.
We’re not rich, but not too poor either, we’re somewhere in the middle. So when challenges come, my mom knows how to face them. When I ask her, “How do you deal with all this? Like when you couldn’t pay off a loan or when things were really tough?” She tells me, “That’s how my mother was. Brave, fearless.
She faced everything and moved forward.” That kind of spirit to not let problems drag you down is what I see in my mom. And for that, I truly thank my grandmother. She may not be with us now, but her strength lives on in my mother.
I feel like you’re a source of hope and support for me, staying by my side, and I believe you’ll help us overcome these hardships. Wherever you are, I have complete faith that you’re blessing all of us, Grandma.
I believe what elders say is right—because it’s been there from way back. Now people say “colleagues said this,” or “computer says that,” but I don’t believe in all that. What the elders said, I follow.
Thank you so much, Appa. You did a lot of good for me in life. You bought me a house, you set up a business for me. I’m deeply thankful for everything. The life I’m living today is all because of the foundation you gave me. I’ve managed to do everything I needed to, one step at a time.
But because you gave me that courage, taking care of the family, working very hard, all of that I’m still carrying forward even today. I’m doing good work now, Appa. So many changes have happened in my life recently. I’m becoming even more courageous and confident, and I’m achieving everything I have now. In my dreams, I always know you’re with us.